Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Overwhelming feelings

I work at a University medical school, where I know there is animal research going on, with all kinds of animals.  In addition, the med school students dissect human cadavers.  That does not bother me in the least.  However, the animals... most of the time I can go about my day and not think about it.  But sometimes I stop, and the feeling overwhelms me, that I just cannot stand it - I cannot live in a world where helpless creatures are experimented on, I cannot live in a world where atrocities are occurring daily (children starving, people being tortured, etc.).  When these feelings overwhelm me, I just don't want to even exist anymore.  I always pull myself together, but it is terrifying, this feeling.  I don't know if it's an HSP (Highly Sensitive Person - see Elaine Aron) thing.  I just feel like it is, because I imagine most people are walking around in their own worlds and don't think of such things.  It always makes me hope that there is something else, after this life, where we (animals included) can exist without pain and suffering.  If not, then I don't see the point in life at all.